Arsenal and No Trace. Collective Theatre.

Collective Theatre N7 producers Luna Laurenti, Al Hawkins, and Alessa Lewis draw on Joseph Kesselring’s 1940s Broadway megahit Arsenic And Old Lace in their short Christmas-themed dark comedy Arsenal and No Trace. The result is a meta pastiche of Amdram murder mysteries that, though amiable in its way, is light on laughs and has more plot holes than the nearby Finsbury Park station has entrances.

It is Christmas Eve in a modest, power-cut-prone flat in Highbury Hill. Eleanor (a heavily Russian-accented Lena Knight who hams it up as if there is a nationwide surfeit of gammon) and her putative sister Angela (Wanja Mary Sellers in full-on dotty Aunt mode) are preparing for a family Christmas with their seductive niece (Martina Bizzarri snarls viperously).

The duo takes a shine to computer repairman Dominic (Jahrhys Greenidge, who seems to be auditioning for Jordan Peele’s movie Get Out) and offers the lad a yuletide dinner invitation.  “We won’t take no for an answer,” says Angela, wistfully recalling the TV repairman who appeared on the menu for last year’s bash. “I love having young people for dinner… my sister and I are incurable carnivores,” says Eleanor. A brand-new chainsaw is under the Christmas tree, and Angela is busy crushing pills to mix into Dominic’s drinks. Oh, and the sisters enjoy some very odd maid and mistress roleplay, to boot.

Add into the mix crime journalist neighbour Riccardo (Carlo Spano), who dreams of writing detective plays and frets over the fate of seven local young men. The lads have disappeared without a trace, mostly during holiday periods and some in this very street. Of course, this being a whodunit, things get murky quickly. Natasha and Dominic may not be the innocents they appear to be, and what is lonely Riccardo hiding in his basement boudoir? Anticipate red herrings, twists, turns, and meta-theatrical nods to The Play That Goes Wrong and its ilk.

Arsenal and No Trace is strewn with plot holes, the characters have little backstory or depth, and the ending is comprehensively devoid of sense. However, one suspects the producers’ motive is to go through the comedic murder mystery motions rather than concern themselves with a satisfying denouement. To be successful, this genre requires humour, which is woefully absent here except for Eleanor’s tortuously tone-deaf rendition of a Christmas song. Laurenti and Hawkins direct at a snail’s pace, and some dreadfully extended scene transitions leave the pace lacking momentum. There is a nub of a good idea here, and the hour passes by quickly enough, but this still feels like a work in progress.

STAR RATING:  2 stars

Writers and Directors:  Luna Laurenti and Al Hawkins